[Unique_Princess]

Quote:

For u:

Here comes the sun, here comes the sun,
and I say it's all right

Little darling, it's been a long cold lonely winter
Little darling, it feels like years since it's been here
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
and I say it's all right

Little darling, the smiles returning to the faces
Little darling, it seems like years since it's been here
Here comes the sun, here comes the sun
and I say it's all right

I love you! You never fail to make me smile.

[Unique_Princess]

Look at me
You may think you see
Who I really am
But you’ll never know me
Every day, is as if I play a part
Now I see
If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
But I can not fool my heart
Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

I am now
In a world where I have to
Hide my heart
And what I believe in
But somehow
I will show the world
What’s inside my heart
And be loved for who I am

Who is that girl I see
Staring straight back at me?
Why is my reflection
Someone I don’t know?
Must I pretend that i’m
Someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show
Who I am inside?

There’s a heart that must be free to fly,

That burns with a need to know the reason why….

Why must we all conceal

What we think….

How we feel….

Must there be a secret me
I’m forced to hide?
I won’t pretend that i’m
Someone else
For all time
When will my reflections show
Who I am inside?
When will my reflections show
Who I am inside?

[Unique_Princess]

Rofl, nooo I wasn't trying to sound like you on purpose. As I was writing that I realised what was happening LOL.

You know, I have NEVER even spoken to the girl but there's something about her that reminds me of you soooooo much. I don't know what it is! I can't seem to explain it. lol I'll have a think about it and tell you. Her name is Rosheen I think. She's British but she looks German or Polish. Actually the way she dressed in the last class made her look French. But she is from here because the teacher made us tell the whole class where we are all from at the beginning of term lol. She's short, of a petite nature and really pretty Masha'Allah. But its not her appearance that makes me think of you, well it is a little but that's just crazy cuz I have never seen you! lol. (Wow that sounds so weird to say because I feel like I've known you all my life lol aww I luv ya!) I don't know what it is that reminds me of you!!!! lol this is so crazy. I was actually thinking that if I ever happen to be in mystery land (where ever that may be) (maybe I've already been there without knowing) but we could have walked past each other without ever knowing! lol how strange! When I look at her I wish she was you sometimes. It would make the class a WHOLE lot more interesting lmao. But then I wouldn't know if she was you! I'd have to wait for her to do something crazy like talk to herself all of a sudden really loudly, or I'd have to wait for it to rain and then follow her to see if she begins dancing . Or check her work to look for immaculate spelling and punctuation LOL. Sighh! I don't think Rosheen has any clue as to what Bollywood is even! lmao maybe I shouldn't talk to her. She may take away the Boo-ness I see in her . There's this other girl called Chantal who reminds me of Nessa. I think I told Nessa once lmao.

Ooooh Harry Potter style!!! lol. Boo! leave all the 'evil with love' thing to J.K. Rowling! rofl! lets just take our chocolate pool away from Mount Gloom/Doom and move it to Mount John Abraham. ROFL. He was on tv today .

Senor Saab is coming no where near our chocolate pool until he is properly dressed! LOL!

Awww I love that song!! *dances around with Boo* – you know dancing in the chocolate pool sounds more fun lol. But we'd be burning and putting on calories at the same time roflmao! oooh and I have lots of chocos left over because I am trying to be health conscious! lol! and partly because I'm trying to save them for when I am free and can relax with a good book and my chocolates. My brothers are trying to eat them though! I know it! because I see one less everyday. The fools think I don't know. lol.

Ok now to get rid of this ghum….What gets rid of ghum? I know! How about we put all the well wishes and prayers we have recieved over the years from our family, friends in 'real' life and friends on the forum alll in one big mountain… it will be symbolised by a beautiful smelling white pearly gas, and then we let out the ghum which will be a foul black colour. Then slowly the two will battle and the black ghum will start going gray and be overpowered by the gas of 'duas and prayers' which will finish off the black ghum and restore sunshine over mount gloom, and then we will rename it Mount BOOM BOOM BOOM! PARTAYYY! (okay that was so gay but you get the jist right?!) lmao. Ghum will never stay when we have the prayers and wishes fr

[Unique_Princess]

oh and rani! remember to count 7 hours ahead this time instead of 8 hours! because the time has gone back! actually just leave me an offline message on my MSN or leave a message here, I'm up reading so I'll check here every now and then.

[Unique_Princess]

The time goes back here one hour today. So right now its 00:15 am, does that mean its not actually 00:15am but actually 23:15pm?? uhhh help? lol. I hate that the time has gone back… that means days of darkness by 5pm . I hate this time of year with a passion…. wish I could rewind back to summer where it got dark around 10pm…. sighh!

Rani – are you gona call hunny? Did you find my mobile number again? My phone is off though.. you can call my house today the latest around 12:30amish.. I have the phone with me. Imma try and pick it up on the first ring but if it rings more than twice and I haven't picked up, then hang up quickly! rofl. love ya x

[Unique_Princess]

Quote:

I think I've worked out why on earth I am always bursting with joy and hyper when I'm around you Tayba… you make me feel that way. Such a beautiful gift you have given me, girl… the least I can give you back is my love. (That sounds like I only give you my love because you give it to me or blah blah something silly and politicsy like that.. but you know what I mean! I LOVE YOU A LOT!)

Awwww! how sweet! Don't worry Boo, Insha'Allah I'll always stick with you, that way you'll always be bursting with joy! (not that I am sticking with you JUST so you can feel joy, okay that sounds so wrong LMAO. but you get what I mean right? You give me lots of joy too.. lmao Boo! look what you did now! I sound like you in the post you just wrote to me ROFLMAO!)

Quote:

So much ghum man… what do I do with it all?

You give it to me, I'll throw it in with mine and then we'll find somewhere to dump it.

Quote:

I feel like packing it away into a little box (though, I doubt a little box will be huge enough for the amount of ghum I have to cram in there!) and throwing it off into the sea and then dancing on the beach. (I might even take a leaf out of Senor Saab's book… ROFLMAO! Sigh!)

Then it will be like a Lord of the Rings thing, won't it… the evil evil box of ghum… created by the Lordess Boo… oh but wait, I don't want to be Sauron. I guess it will be LOTR with a twist then…. some poor soul millions of years later will find that box of ghum… and will make it his – or her () – life mission to destroy that box of ghum.

Then there will be a fight – happiness vs all the evil spirits of ghum (I don't believe in spirits, but let's just go with the flow. )… the evil spirits are rising… there is so much ghum in the world, and it is up to the few khushi-ised people left on Mystery Earth to fight them and bring khushi into Mystery Earth for ever after.

The battle is long and hard.. sacrifices are made (no blood is shed, mind you. Well DUH!! Spirits don't have blood to be shed… or do they? ), tears are shed, sweat is poured out of skins… and finally, the final battle comes. The poor soul carrying my ghum is very, very near Mount Gloom.. and there are pseudo-battles everywhere… spirits evaporating off the face of Mystery Earth one by one.. and the box is thrown into the huge roaring pool of melted chocolate in Mount Gloom. The ghum gets dissected into a million and one piece by the force of the chocolate.. and ghum is forever gone.

Okay Boo, LOL at your imagination there missy! I can almost imagine the in-between bits where you talk to yourself. Have I told you there is a girl in my class who reminds me SO much of you that I can't stop staring at her and wondering if you look anything like her. (She probably thinks I'm a freak but w/e ).

Now with the ghum box. Rofl you reminded me of the myth of Pandora's Box!!! hahaha!! Also, if there's a “pool of melted chocolate” then WHAT in the world is it doing in 'Mount Gloom'!!!!!!!!!! Chocolate is meant to be comforting, woman! (until it gets you fat. Damn that delicious treat).

Alsoooo, the ghum doesn't deserve to be thrown into the melted pool of chocolate!

[Unique_Princess]

You gotta be out there
You gotta be somewhere
Wherever you are
I'm waiting
'Cause there are these nights when
I sing myself to sleep
And I'm hopin' my dreams
Bring you close to me
Are you listening?

Hear me
I'm cryin' out
I'm ready now
Turn my world upside down
Find me
I'm lost inside the crowd
It's getting loud
I need you to see
I'm screaming for you to please
Hear me
Hear me

Hear me
Can you hear me?
Hear me

I used to be scared of
Letting someone in
But it gets so lonely
Being on my own
No one to talk to
And no one to hold me
I'm not always strong
Oh, I need you here
Are you listening?

Hear me
I'm cryin' out
I'm ready now
Turn my world upside down
Find me
I'm lost inside the crowd
It's getting loud
I need you to see
I'm screaming for you to please
Hear me

I'm restless and wild
I fall, but I try
I need someone to understand
Can you hear me?
I'm lost in my thoughts
And baby I've fought
For all that I've got
Can you hear me?

[Unique_Princess]

Quote:

*hugs Tayba tightly* Oh oh oh oh, things will things will work themselves out! The sun will be brighter tomorrow!

*hugs Ness back* I hope so Insha'Allah. I hate being sad… but I can't help it right now. There has been no sun for two days now either .

[Unique_Princess]

Quote:

Quote:

Can't put anything into my own words right now, so….

I know that when you look at me
There's so much that you just don't see
But if you would only take the time
I know in my heart you'd find
A girl who's scared sometimes
Who isn't always strong
Can't you see the hurt in me?
I feel so all alone..

…… cries.

My dear Tayba,

This is for you…

I wanna run to you, oo,
I wanna run to you, oo.

Then what are you still doing in mystery land, huh.?! Huh?!?! Come over! I have my awtr book and dvd ready

Won't you let me hold you in my arms
And keep you safe from harm?

Of course I will… I need that so much right now… so so so much… I need to know it’ll be okay…

I wanna run to you, oo. (I'll run to you, oo)
But if I come to you, oo,
Tell me will you smile,
Or be sad anyway?

I’ll smile that you’re here… of course! I wont be sad if the sadness goes… I pray it does…

(Don't you dare) Run away,
No, I need you there,

I won’t run away from you. Ever.
I need you there so I can wipe away your tears,
To <span st

[Unique_Princess]

Quote:

I am so scared that, one day, I might have bipolar disorder.

A ridiculous thing to say now, I know. I am no hypochondriac (hah!) and I know suicide and physical harm to self are not options for me (as of now, anyway). I have a lot going for me right now (I say this at the risk of sounding important and 'big'… but I know you guys get what I mean!).. I have no intention of quitting all that I am working for.

But… but but but.

There are days – no no, moments, rather – when I am so so so happy… I feel like Life is hugging me tight and jumping around with incredible joy that I will not do injustice to by expressing in words.

And then come moments when I feel like I have hit rock bottom. I have not really, of course. As I said, I have a lot going for me right now. But when one is in that state of mind, one does not think clearly. When you are feeling so sad, so lonely, because the one thing you live for – Love, in my case – is not there… there is little rational thought going on in your mind. There are moments when I feel like giving everything up (not dying or self-harming myself), but just giving up on everything that makes me me. Because I don't have the energy for it. Not of the physical sort, but the mental sort. It takes me all of my energy just to remain strong and smiling, where am I supposed to find the energy to actually succeed in life? There are moments when I let my sadness take me over completely, and weaken me. The side-effects of this, of course, show in the downward plunge in my performance. With people, with work, with everything. I see myself becoming the person I don't want to be. And I find myself falling into a downward spiral. I actually see myself, falling down with no control.. and the worst thing is, I can't do anything about it.

Nobody else can live my life for me, get over the difficult times for me. They can offer me comfort and warmth, but I am such a person who does not share my sorrows (nor some of my joys… including BWL, as an example of a joy in my life I do not share with the people in my life). I do not want anyone to find out. I want to battle this out myself. And yet, I am so scared, that I won't be able to.

When your heart takes over your brain, your everything depends on the mood of the heart. When the heart feels light and full of joy, you feel it too. And by the same token, when the heart feel heavy with sorrow, you feel it too.

I know I do not show all the symptoms for a bipolar disorder right now. Maybe I never will. But I am still very scared. I have seen what having a bipolar disorder (cannot remember which type) does to people, and I do not want to be like that. I have seen the pains that come with the depression in a bipolar, and I do not want that. I have a life, family (though none of my own), friends, a present and a future (and a past that I fondly keep sticking my head into..)… I have many things I am yet to do, many dreams I am yet to realise. Most importantly, I have real, real, real ANGELS in my life.. the people I love so much, so, so, so much. Words cannot describe how much their presence lights up my life, they really can't. Just take my word for it. I do not want to imagine a life without them. I do not want to even think about cutting them out of my life because I somehow felt the 'need' to, by having a bipolar disorder. I do not want to be on medication for a significant part (if not the rest) of my life, or battling it out with a psychiatrist. I do not want to fight a battle with myself for the rest of my life.

I am a positive person. Rude as this may sound (and my apologies for that in advance), I don't want to be one of those people that wastes away their life by being sad and depressed (to the point of it actually destroying their lives). (I also, just to show you the bigger picture here, do not want to be one of those people that are hanging on to drugs/cigarettes/alcohol and watching themselves helplessly

[Unique_Princess]

Bismillah….

To my dearest, sweetest, cutest, most amazing Foberina EVER ,

Happy Birthday habeebati!!! Rani said she’s going to your house today so I am sending a BIG hug your way with her. I love you soooooooooooooo much my sister!!!! This is for you 😉 I couldn't find the arabic lyrics so I am posting it in English, and have changed just one word (hopefully I have got it right! lol)

Ya Ukhti (Oh My Sister)

[Unique_Princess]

Can't put anything into my own words right now, so….

I know that when you look at me
There's so much that you just don't see
But if you would only take the time
I know in my heart you'd find
A girl who's scared sometimes
Who isn't always strong
Can't you see the hurt in me?
I feel so all alone..

…… cries.

[Unique_Princess]

Tujhse Naaraz Nahin Zindagi, Hairaan Hoon Main
Tere Masoom Sawaalon Se Pareshan Hoon Main.

Jeene Ke Liye Sochaa Hi Nahin Dard Sambhaalne Honge
Muskuraaye Toh Muskuraane Ke Karz Utaarne Honge
Muskuraaye Joh Kabhi, Toh Lagta Hai Jaise Hothon Pe Karz Rakha Hai
Tujhse Naaraz Nahin Zindagi, Hairaan Hoon Main
Tere Masoom Sawaalon Se Pareshan Hoon Main

Aaj Agar Bhar Aai Hain Boondein, Baras Jayengi
Kal Kya Pata Kis Ke Liye Aankhen Taras Jaayengi…..?
Jaane Kahaa Goom Hua, Kahaa Khoya
Ek Aansoo Chhupa Ke Rakha Tha
Tujhse Naaraz Nahin Zindagi, Hairaan Hoon Main
Tere Masoom Sawaalon Se Pareshan Hoon Main.

Zindagi, Tere Gham Ne Humay Rishte Naye Samjhaaye
Dhoop Mein Milay, Joh Bhi Milay, Pyar Ke Tanday Saaye …
Tujhse Naaraz Nahin Zindagi, Hairaan Hoon Main
Tere Masoom Sawaalon Se Pareshan Hoon Main……

*Sighs* This song is Soooo beautiful… I want to share the english translation with you guys…

I am not upset with you Life…. I am astounded.

I am distressed by your innocent questions.

In order to live, I did not think I’d have to handle sorrows

To smile, I did not think I’d have to pay the debt of smiling.

If ever I smile it feels as if there is a debt upon my lips.

I am not upset with you Life…. I am astounded.

I am distressed by your innocent questions

Today if my eyes fill with drops of tears, then they will fall.

Who knows whom these eyes will long for tomorrow…?

Who knows where I lost,

The one tear I had kept hidden.

I am not upset with you Life…. I am astounded.

I am distressed by your innocent questions

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[Unique_Princess]

Glad you liked it Nessa. Yeah its a much better way to look at it. Makes so much sense.

[Unique_Princess]

If God answers your prayers, He is increasing your faith. If He delays, He is increasing your patience. If He doesn't answer, He has something better in store for you.

So true… .

[Unique_Princess]

Boo that's so cute. *Sighs* I want to be on a beach too…. feel like just forgetting everything and everyone and going far away.

[Unique_Princess]

ROFLMAO.

drama drama drama

[Unique_Princess]

Yes jaan I have felt and do still feel like that a lot. Its not a nice place to be. I am so sorry you feel that way. I am more sorry that people do not seem to realise your true worth. You are an amazing gem. You don't realise how much I respect you. I love you. You inspire me soooo much… I have become a better person after YOU came in to my life. Your wisdom, your insight, your friendship, EVERYTHING about you has a deep and important value in my life. You are not just my friend, you are my sister, and someone who helps and guides me. I appreciate you and I want you! I hope I can try and understand even. And if you still feel that I don't, then Insha'Allah I will always be here to listen to you and give you my shoulder. You already have my heart so I don't need to give that to you right now. I'm proud of who you are and I realise just how much you do for people. Allah is seeing it all, you WILL be rewarded Insha'Allah. Ameen, Thumma Ameen. x 10000000 for the sweetest duderina in my life. I love you. Feel better soon ..!

[Unique_Princess]

lol rani thanks. I did have a blast! I always love our convos .

Senor *waves* how you doing?

[Unique_Princess]

lol raniiii! Jiya dhadak dhadak jaaaaye!

Yes rani, what's cooking! Senor and I are coming for lunch! but please mush up his food because SuperTayba is having a tired day and cannot risk senor choking on his food! lmao! awww how I have missed this place! I've had such a busy two weeks and the next few look very busy too =( have a bit of time now so I'm here =D

luv u guys!

Ooooh! The ice cream van guy just parked up and my little brother went to get an ice cream! and The ice cream man (this super cool guy who has always been our ice cream man for as long as I can remember. We used to get ice cream off him when we were like 5!) but anyway he said he won't be back till next year now and its his last day today as winter is on its way (boo hoo, I loved the summer and I am LOVING the BEAUTIFUL Autumn we're having) but anyway he gave us a whole box full off ice creams and ice lollies! He told us we can have the supply! My bro was super happy! lol so am I! I loveee ice cream! Even in winter! What a sweet guy!

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