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    • #6760
      Nosyira
      Participant

      Hi…. I thought of starting this thread so that we could ask and answer each other’s questions abt life…

      Since we are just human beings, we sure do have a lot of questions, maybe burning questions in our mind. So feel free to ask and if you do have any opinions/suggestions/comments about the questions, we could have a discussion and see where the answers lead us to…..

      So, my first question is, how does a guy shows that he has no more feelings for the girl, either showing it directly or indirectly…….. any kind mind?

    • #45528
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      Hey Nosyira – I believe you are new here – Welcome!
      Did not visit the forum in a while now I am just seeing your thread
      Come on guys – I am sure all of you have so many q’s to ask yourselves!

      Okay – maybe you shouldnt take my answer seriously because I did not have experience with concerning your question but lets see ; my answer would be that ; He seems changed – even though if he is not telling you or showing you his change concretely – you can pick it out! Compare and contrast the times of present and times of past and the difference would be visible. That could be indirect. Also, maybe he would seem a little more insensitive or indifferent towards you? mayb ehe would spend time away from you? not call you as often anymore? past his time doing other stuff with other people? [ouch ] Directly? – um..he would tell you?
      WHat do you think though? I mean how would you a nswer your q?

    • #45529
      boo
      Participant

      hey kavi she aint new… been here since the beginning of the old forum… she’s been stalking us heh!

      you have to know the guy, and know how he is. i cant really help with that cos every relationship (romantic or otherwise) is different. maybe he’s just looking for some space or maybe he’s losing feelings… i guess u either use ur instincts… or you ask him. depends how close u r to him… if u feel u can talk, then you should talk. Smile

      good luck.

      (or was that just a general question not applying to you? lol)

      my burning question is:

      will Shah Rukh EVER get the courage to ask me to marry him? haha. Stick out tongue

      no i cant think of any burning questions right now…

      take care.

    • #45530
      Khushi
      Participant

      Boo- Sadly, Gauri wont let him! Im sure he’s dying to ask you… but… *sigh* Dont worry, theres always Shehzaada u got to look for! Wink

    • #45531
      boo
      Participant

      khushiiii…. ur post made me smile. haha. and i felt like announcing that in a public forum. thank you. Smile Right Hug

      and ur so lovely-ly pagal… i totally understand why rani loves u so much! Smile Right Hug

      and shehzaada?? what do u want me to do huh? put an ad in the newspaper? LOL!!! Big Smile

      Wanted:

      Caring, non-sharky Shehzaada for sweet Shehzaadi. Must look like Shah Rukh Khan. Else, get lost. If you think you’re the one, contact Khushi first. She’s got to approve of you first. Best of luck.

      LMAO!!!! Big Smile

    • #45532
      Khushi
      Participant

      Awwww Boo ur soo sweeet! Right Hug LMHO – I love thr addd!!! thatsbeing saved too! Wink

    • #45533
      boo
      Participant

      hai re… what is the world coming to??

      am rani ji printing every thread out and you saving every thing… Big Smile Big Smile

      course u love the add… Stick out tongue

      and LMHO?

    • #45534
      Khushi
      Participant

      Laughing My Head Off – clean language is what Khushi always goes on n on about!

    • #45535
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      Hello allll… ohhh i didnt know she was an old member boo ; by the way boo your advice was good
      Hahahahhahahaa you guys are cracking me up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hhahhahaaa boo gosh you’re also one of the girls who want srk to marry them huh…ehehehehehheee emmm i agree with khushi lol gauri would probably go crazy at the though of that!

      Hehehehehe your ad was……… hmm how should i say it..creative but what are the odds of that huh..must look like srk!! lol me and some others in another thread i cant remember were talking how we gotta have someone who look just like srk lol..you hit it on the head lol..must look like srk , else get lost..lol you’re funny hehehehhehee

      yup khushi i see you got the decent language all written down..even if we’re initialling words Yes

    • #45536
      asmaprincess
      Participant

      HAHAHAH..u girls r funnie!!!! “else get lost”..kavita, that cracked me up too!

      boo, maybe u shld put ..this is kajol, lookin for srk…contact if mujhe kuch kuch hota hai..

      hahaha..see straight to the point….srk will *** dyin for kadz!!

      hii …i dont have experience either..but i am guessin like everyone
      said, he wld act differently..try to ignore u…he juz wldnt act the
      same way as he was when he was interested in u

      ok my question: is it just me…or cramming last minute really help?
      …[ahem]..ya so i am doin my essay rite now which is due 2MORO..but
      hey, it works….have u noticed how u do so much better when u cram?

    • #45537
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      Hey hehehe yep boo and khushi made me crack up.. oh wait..hydro.. boo said the get lost part , i was just repeating it and laughing bc it made me laugh hahah

      hehehehhee well if boo ever put this is kajol lloking for srk – well gauri would go running after kajol !

      hahhaa..yes ab out the q … we dont really have experience, or am i speaking for myself, anyway, you’d just know bc you would feel an underlying build up of tension that never leaves and he would act different to you i suppose

      Hydro ===> For your Question ===> Cramming does help. Its really stressful because you have to CRAM and stick a wholebunch of stuff in your head. BUt I think why it helps is because WE KNOW WE HAVE TO DO IT , and so we PUSH ourselves to the greatest of our extent. But if we did less of this, on daily basis, it would be LESS stressful with same results. ==> my opinions

    • #45538
      boo
      Participant

      laughter is the best medicine… thanks guys! Smile

      asma: g’luck!!

    • #45539
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      yes boo it is the best medicine..thanks TO YOU! for making us laugh hahahhaa

      asma how are you coming around with those class work

    • #45540
      Nosyira
      Participant

      hi everybody….. thanks kavita, boo, asmaprincess for all your opinions… I appreciate it… Smile

      for asma well yes some ppl strive under pressure and works best if they do their work last minute but other ppl hate to cram their work and plan their work in advance.. they like their neat world to be orderly always… I guess you come under the first category? Haha….

      for boo.. will SRK ever get the courage? No way! Coz you are just tooo sweet for him! Wink

      well I guess only I would know the answer to my qn rite? The thing is, I don’t know…. The guy says these things bt his actions and all the signs show otherwise… I just believe that he still feels for me….. I don’t know why…. should I believe these signs / belief / feelings or should I believe him? what would you do?

      Do you guys believe in signs? Do you always go with your instincts?

    • #45541
      boo
      Participant

      ehy thanks. i know. poor guy. doenst know what’s good for him. Wink

      i dont know. sometimes u gotta look out for sings, but arent sings instincts anyway? like if ur following ur sings, ur following what u think they mean, and that’s ur instincts… why not just talk to him? he says he doesnt have feelings for u nemore? maybe he’s looking for space… i rly dont know. especially since i dont know u or him or the relationship between u 2. so rly its for someone else who knows u (or urself or him) to know… Tongue Tied

      sorry that doesnt rly help does it??!!

    • #45542
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      Hahaha boo.. well first ..i think you are right, because for us to really give the greatest advice ( well that is if we have any ) it would had been best if we knew Nosyira’s feelings , the guy and the relationship between them.. well we dont..but thats okay cos we arent nosy!!

      but from what nosyira is saying , we can still give our opinions and advice, even if its in the “it depends” answer

    • #45543
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      Nosyira, Hi, Okay. You are right, you are really the only one who have the most information , clues, signs, etc, to answer your own question. But the thing is you have to measure what you know. And its good too to come here and tell us, or ask in this sense, so you can get it off your chest and also, get some other opinions. First of all, measure out how well you know the guy. If you know him really well, and you know that you can trust him, then it would probably be easier to over look some of the small negative things that are happening. If you dont really know him that well, and know you cant really trust him, then the doubts that you have between what he is saying and what he is actually doing, you should look into it , and confront him, or maybe HINT to him that you need to KNOW and that you know that he is acting different. You know many of us cant go up to people and just say stuff; So we HINT. Many do it in joking form. Many just do it seriosly but hinting. As for the Signs – you have to weigh these signs out. Gather all the signs in your head. Then make a mental balance – and the signs you think are big*** or mean something big*** , put it on one side ; the signs that you are not even sure of if its suppose to be giving you solutions and is small in meaning – put iton the other side of the balance – this will tell you if to believe your signs! In other words, I am thinking as signs, you mean stuff that are assumed between the two of you and they arent just said boldly? Take for instance if he hears that you are gonna start talking with a friend of yours who is a guy who just got in contact with you , and the guy sort of gets angry at it or upset, then you can put that as a sign under the ‘lot of importance’ side. I dont know if this makes sense but maybe it would help you if you decide to atleast think about the whole ‘measuring’ out thing.

    • #45544
      asmaprincess
      Participant

      Nosyira – I know what you mean..sometimes you feel like the guy has
      something for you..but he doesnt say anything and you don’t..and it
      doesnt matter to the guy but the girl ends up confusing herself from
      the side…I know this is gonna sound way out of your league..but the
      best thing is to talk to him..you know what whatver….the guy doesnt
      have to be the first one..why should you waste time over someone who
      wont waste time over you..maybe he does care for you but something else
      is on his mind or maybe he doenst..the best way is to just talk to
      him…you will feel so much better you did..all things wil clear up…

    • #45545
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      Hey hydro..yes..definitely talking it out and attempting to resolve everything will definnitely help if you cant say everything boldly just hint stuff until you get your way to actually say what you want to say..or ask what you want to ask

    • #45546
      Nosyira
      Participant

      hey thanks guys for the advice and suggestions… i really appreciate it…. i cant talk to him coz situation doesnt allow us… but i tried the measuring thing, kavita.. thanks.. it was heavy on one side.. bt we are just helpless… i am grateful to Him for making me realize things and am grateful for whatever happened… Now i just leave everything to fate and go with the flow.. Smile

      i think i should move on to another qn. i really, really need to motivate myself! pls, help! sometimes when you feel that life is stagnant and you need to keep on moving and making changes, and you just can’t do anything about it. where is my self motivation?! where was the spirit and energy i had last time?! hmm..

      how do you guys motivate yourself? do you guys have any suggestions?

    • #45547
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      you’re welcome anytime ! well i guess its a cool idea to go with the flow but make sure you know what you’re doing i mean just dont go with the flow because of not making an effort to think things through but in times like these , well going with the flow is just the best way to handle situations!!!!!

      oh well next question..okay i dont ahve an answer to this bc i need to hear answers too!!!! good question i need answers for this one

    • #45548
      boo
      Participant

      how do i motivate myself?

      i dont. im a lazy git. lol. Stick out tongue

    • #45549
      asmaprincess
      Participant

      wow good question..hmmmm….now that you ask, I dont even know how I motivate myself..Tongue Tied

    • #45550
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      Come on!!! Someone has to know the answerrrrrrrrrr
      I really dont know it bc I need motivation my self……………………………………

    • #45551
      asmaprincess
      Participant

      OH i know. I think encouraging really does motivate me. For example, if
      I was doing something and I am really failing at it, but someone comes
      and say “Cmon, I know you can do it” thats it….dat one sentence
      really pushes me. s. It just shows that the person really really wants
      you to do this. So to make him/her happy and cuz they believe in you, I
      keep going.

      OH and another that keeps me going is the prize.hahaha…ok that
      sounded conceited. If I do something and I am going to get something
      [like an award or a prize] , I would do my very best to get that.

      Hope thats good enough? Maybe this will help others realize wat motives them.

    • #45552
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      Hey haha..well yup encouragine definitely helps… if the person really means it when they say com one you can do it! and believe in you – then they give you al ittle confidence boosting huh…….. hahah the prize part is kinda true but not everythign we do have a prize at the end…or actually the prize is gonna take forever lol…like getting adegree sighs its taking forever!! okay if you guys have any other andwers to this q..feel free to answer okay but i just wanna ask another questiong, asma i think you’ll know about this already :

      Okay im sorry to interrupt any topics here especially if they are nice hapy topics… I just wanted to ask something

      You guys know of those pple who eat and then vomit ….? Do you guys really think that it makes you look skinnier? Sorry I’ve been worried about my weight and all lately… dont worry Im not gonna do that i think thats ew…. i mean..but iwas justw ondering if you guys knew anything about it? and by the way…doesnt it hurt to make yourself vomit..? ackSad

    • #45553
      Nosyira
      Participant

      oh u are definitely not interrupting, kavz since this thread is the place to ask any qns you have.. Smile

      Found these on internet so thought of sharing….

      Bulimia
      Victims of Bulimia usually have emotional difficulties in their lives such as depression, stress, or self esteem issues. To them, eating is a way of coping with these difficulties. They consume large quantities of food like two, three or even four times a normal amount of food in one go. To ease tension or to fill the emotional gap. They tend to eat food that are high in calories, carbohydrates and fats like ice cream, cake, and pastry. Sometimes up to 20,000 calories at a time.

      During the binge episode, the individual experiences a loss of control. Then, feelings of guilt and shame come into your mind. In desperation, they purge what they consume At this point, some people describe feeling emotionally relieved and physically light-headed but only for a brief time. Then self-disgust. They get trapped in this cycle of obsession and get addicted and it is hard for them to get out of it and stop.

      Usually, victims are high achievers and they are not satisfied with their appearance. They are self-assured outside but feel inadequate inside. Bulimia is more difficult for others to notice as they tend not to lose weight so dramatically, or their weight will fluctuate. They also tend to deny it since they do it in secrecy. Even people close to you at home or work may not recognize the illness, so it can persist for many years undetected.


      The effects of bulimia on your body
      Frequent weight changes
      Sore throat, tooth decay and bad breath caused by excessive vomiting
      Swollen salivary glands making the face rounder
      Poor skin condition and possible hair loss
      Irregular ‘periods’
      Lethargy and tiredness
      Increased risk of heart problems

      Psychological signs of bulimia
      Uncontrollable urges to eat vast amounts of food
      An obsession with food, or feeling ‘out of control’ around food
      Distorted perception of body weight and shape
      Emotional behaviour and mood swings
      Anxiety and depression; low self-esteem, shame and guilt
      Isolation – feeling helpless and lonely

      Long-term effects of bulimia

      bulimia can take over the life of the person with the disorder, making them feel trapped and desperate. Bingeing, purging and dramatic loss of fluids can cause physical problems which can usually be corrected once the body is nourished in an even and moderate way.

      Bulimia can, in extreme cases, be fatal due to heart failure. An imbalance or dangerously low levels of the essential minerals in the body can significantly, even fatally affect the working of vital internal organs. Other dangers of bulimia include, choking, and erosion of tooth enamel, painful swallowing. Laxative abuse can lead to serious bowel problems.

    • #45554
      Nosyira
      Participant

      A victim of Bulimia…

      Bulimia…My story

      I’m a 21 year old college student that is one of the most active people you will ever meet. I love to race in triathlons, mountain bike, rock climb, sky dive, lift weights, you name and I’m there. When people look at me and talk to me they comment on how healthy I am. I guess that this is why I’m writing this. People are not always as they seem. Like at first glance you may say that I live a very healthy life. But as you take a slower look, the pages begin to turn.

      It’s hard to say were my addition began. I would have to say sometime in middle school. That’s when I began to hate my body. I started off skipping meals and working out off and on. By the time I got into high school, my eating disorder became my life. By my freshman year, no one reconized me. I dropped a few sizes and I didn’t even notice it till my friends began to talk. I went from a size 6 to a size 2. When I looked in the mirror, all I saw was fat. I could of sworn that I gained 50 pounds.

      My main course was some air popped popcorn, and that was only if I workout a lot that day. About half way though my freshmen year, I began to binge and purge. I though that this was so awesome. When I got really hungry, I would go into my kitchen and eat tons of food. I remember sitting on the kitchen floor at 2am and eating a loaf of bread, a box of gram crackers, a bag of chips and then drinking some orange juice to help it all go down. I would feel so guilty that I would go and throw it all up. This happend for a few months then it got even worse. I began to take laxatives and diuretics as meals and kept up the binging and purging. If I was really bad I would bring a heater into my room and crank it up. Plus I would wrap myself with a garbage bag and put on a few layers of sweat pants and sweaters. I lived like this all throughout my high school days.

      When I got to college I wanted to change my life. I tried so hard to quit. I was getting on the right track to recovery. As I was driving down this track, I hit a detour. I fell in love this a guy who seemed to be nice but turned out to be a very mean and abusive man. Soon I went right back to my old ways. Let me get one thing strait though, I am no way blaming him. I just felt better when I throw up. That was the only thing in my life that I thought that I could control. A year and a half later, I left him. I again tried to get back on that road to recovery.

      I thought that since I haven’t thrown up for a while now, I was recovered. But vometing is only a piece of the disease, not the whole thing. Bulima, to me, is like a giant mental mind game. Everyday I woke up and I hate to look into the mirror. I don’t like the person I saw and I felt so guilty everytime someone looked at me and said how healthy I was. I felt like such a lyer. I used to work out for three hours a day. That was my life. I started to do triathlons so I would get to work out even more with out people questioning me.

      To this day, I still have a hard time looking in the mirror. I get so shocked when people ask me if I am a body builder. I love to lift but I have learned to tone it down. I wouldn’t say that I’m recovered, I would put it more like I have learned to live with myself. I am not sure if you ever can recover from an eating disorder. Everyday is a challenge, I’m just glad that I’m one of the lucky ones who lived from this disorder. Some people have died from complications from bulimia. I may not of died but my body will never be the same. A few of my teeth are half gone and I need about 8 root canals, and I have a lot of cavities. (Plus being a college student with out insurance, these dentals problems are not good.)

      People are not al

    • #45555
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      hey wow this sounds scary

      i’ve also asked this q in the say somethign random thread and well

      i’ve decided i cant do bc trying to vomit makes my insides feel really upset if i could stand the feeling i woudl have done it but i cant

    • #45556
      Marine
      Participant

      Damn Nos thats some research that you didBig Smile

      Kavs i’m pround of you that your not gona do itWink

    • #45557
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      wel that research was all about the concern for me and helping me sighs..thanks guys

      thanks alot

      well nah i wont do it but i have to find a next way to get skinnier bc im gaining esp this past week i’ve been eating like so much COZ of a whole bunch of stuff goin on right now when i m worried i eat haha that stinks ne way love ya’ll

      see i prob would but it feels like crap it feels really bad i never actualy got to throw up bc i couldnt make myself do it ewwwwwwwwwww

    • #45558
      Shereena
      Participant

      i think the best way to get “skinnier” would be to just eat healthy and work out regularly…avoid the junk food, but dont deprive yourself. eat minimal amounts of it, and drink alot of water and exercise. n stop stress eating..oo n celery has negative calories. try eating that…dont look for the easy way out though, if u wanan be skinnier work at it and dont expect overnight results

    • #45559
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      Hey sheerena thanks alot for the upper words

      you guys have no idea how you all helped me when i was gonna think about doing all that stuff

      the only thing now is to put my mind to it — work out and diet

      i know i wish if i get stressed then i dont eat then that would be a good thing but when i get stressed i eat like so much!!

      anyway marine behen do it with me plz!!!

      ok and i will try exercise and try diet

      thanks guys

      love

    • #45560
      Nosyira
      Participant

      good luck kavita for your diet program! may u stay motivated!

    • #45561
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      hey..yup./thanks alot!

    • #45562
      Nosyira
      Participant

      welcome!
      talking abt motivation, maybe would like to answer my qn earlier…

      life becomes stagnant because we forget how to re-motivate ourselves.. we sometimes become so stuck on a way of life, or direction that when we encounter any changes, (such as loss, trauma, etc) it causes us to stop and knock us off balance..
      we feel it is easier to be in our comfort zone rather than to chase a dream.. we create excuses which causes us to be stationary..

      we also encounter waiting around for something better to happen from time to time. every time we try to move forward, we stop and wait for the “other shoe to drop”.. is it fear of commitment? or success? however, while waiting and hoping for the best, we let opportunities pass by..

      therefore i think the way to re-motivate yourself is to have a vision or dream for a fulfilling life.. So find that something better, and take it!

    • #45563
      RaNi iS ThE BeS
      Participant

      mmm…..I have a question…

      Are you afraid of marriage?

    • #45564
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      i am ……… totally

    • #45565
      Nosyira
      Participant

      well yes i do..
      maybe fear of the unknown?
      untried and untested, something we haven’t experienced? haha..
      what about you rani?

      i would really like to know ppl’s views on marriage..

    • #45566
      kavita_0026
      Participant

      fear of the unknown well yes that makes alot of sense

      well i dont know about you guys but im scared i mean……. how do we know that we can be good wives and all that i mean what exactly is the duty and how hard/easy is it…

      i guessx you are right, we could be ‘scared’ of this unknown bc we havent experienced it!

    • #45567
      Nosyira
      Participant

      oops i accidentally post here..

    • #45568
      boo
      Participant
      RaNi iS ThE BeS:

      mmm…..I have a question…

      Are you afraid of marriage?

      no.

      i never have been, never will be.

      but just remember that my… absence of fear regarding marraige is because of my situation, and my life… it varies for different people for their own personal reasons.

      marriage for me is a magical bond, that i would be willing to explore… the only reason i would have for marriage is that i want to continue loving the person i love for the rest of my life, feeling more and more love each day… and, importantly, vice versa.

      i know that i don't need a c.rappy piece of paper to tell me how much i love the person i love, or to “show” that i am serious about that love, and i still stick to that theory. but marriage is a personal choice for me, because i WANT to experience Love from that aspect (and, touchwood, i will one day)… the 'official marriage' in itself will make no difference to me OR my love… by now i guess you guys all know i believe in just Love (*rolls eyes*), and married or unmarried – Love is still Love… and it will still grow (unless left to be stifled) whether the couple are married or not…

      jeez, yeah… basically, i want to have my cake and eat it too! Wink

    • #45569
      RaNi iS ThE BeS
      Participant

      Boo, I like your confidence. Smile But what cra,ppy piece of paper are you talking about? Tongue Tied

      boo:
      it varies for different people for their own personal reasons.

      True.

      Nosyira:
      what about you rani?

      Yes, I am afraid of marriage. I don't know what the future holds, so ur right, fear of the unknown. I'm just placing all my trust in Allah. Smile

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