Alie di,
im sending a hug just for you.
Its hard to say 'chin up' so Im just going to say
try to make yourself happy with the things that you have
and keep trying to make yourself, your outlook on life, better
"Ain't nobody else who can make a change but me"
RaNi iS ThE BeS: lol you bum! you're the cutie! and cute eyes? i'd like to think my eyes were at least gorgeous in that pic! LMAO it was cool talking to you tooo! a little embarrassing on my side, but still fun! You do have pretty eyes jaanu It wasss cool hearing you! And you sang for me! Nawww, not a need to feel embarrassed!! lol. It was fun as long as you're fine now and don't have a problem with it. Yeah, Im good now hun mmhmm anger is like that na. you don't really mean everything you say, nothing makes sense, the only thing that makes sense is that you're angry, and once you're all cooled down, it's just not completely the same anymore. Anger is one letter short of danger. that's what i've always believed because i've experienced anger like no one else (well not really but u know what i mean). I'm not too good with anger... Yeah, you're right, you're right hun. I know after we cool down, its all good again. Anger isnt good. I've been okay, how u been my darling? Im alright hun, thanks for asking. I hope you're alright.
lol you bum! you're the cutie! and cute eyes? i'd like to think my eyes were at least gorgeous in that pic! LMAO it was cool talking to you tooo! a little embarrassing on my side, but still fun!
You do have pretty eyes jaanu It wasss cool hearing you! And you sang for me! Nawww, not a need to feel embarrassed!! lol. It was fun
as long as you're fine now and don't have a problem with it. Yeah, Im good now hun
mmhmm anger is like that na. you don't really mean everything you say, nothing makes sense, the only thing that makes sense is that you're angry, and once you're all cooled down, it's just not completely the same anymore. Anger is one letter short of danger. that's what i've always believed because i've experienced anger like no one else (well not really but u know what i mean). I'm not too good with anger...
Yeah, you're right, you're right hun. I know after we cool down, its all good again. Anger isnt good.
I've been okay, how u been my darling? Im alright hun, thanks for asking. I hope you're alright.
/
Aw Alie
Me love you too.
Thanks for the hug.
Now, Im sending you some!
Hugggssssssssssssssssssssssssss
More hugssssssssssssssssssssssssssss
And some moreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
I miss my friend... bloody idiot went off on holiday... Life SUCKS!!
~ Mohobbat to ek javeda zindagi hai... ~
Aw hun, the time can seem forever when a loved one has left huh
Its gonna be okay. It should mean much to you that they havent left forever but they'll be back ... (I hope)
We're here for you
How can someone be so cruel?
I'm miserable.
I miss him so much.
Been going crazy and overboard with the daydreams.
This is what I get.
Main kitni gaddi thi. Kitni badi bewakoof. Tab hi toh yeh sab ho raha hai mere saath.
*siiigh* Bewakoof...
Rani
I know it hurts. Sometimes we have to go through some pain to understand our true feelings ... which will then help us to work on things ( self and self perception included) to feel even a bit better.
As for some people being cruel, if you're talking about being in love ... it can be the worst pain if you love/like someone and they dont love/like you back. I dont know if thats what you're referring to ... but ... that does suck. But you have to realize that that person is out there living their life, and you shouldnt let them interrupt yours. Also, you must accept .. although its hard (at first) ... that everyone has a right to their feelings. I have this belief ... its that, if both people dont like/love each other ... the relationship will go no where in the long run. I have no idea if Im making the right connections between you and your feelings. If Im not, im sorry just umm .. ignore this.
I know you're probably not talking about people in general but ... question .... why cant everyone just be nice to each other? Why are some people so mean and nasty?
I hope you will be okay hun. Dont take it too hard on yourself. You dont deserve it.
Let your strength grow in times like these. I know you're staring at the screen like ... yeah, sure..like thats gonna happen. I guess what I mean is that ... let your strength grow after this bout of sadness/helplessness.
Love you. Im here if you need to talk about it.
No, the people being cruel wasn't a reference to being in love shove. I don't know if I'm going to be okay. Thank you jaan, ur so kind, mashaAllah. Speaking of the one you like being cruel. I'm so mad at him. How can he "lead me on" so beautifully like that and then stop talking to me just like that? I mean I dreamed it would work out, he WOVE some of those dreams HIMSELF, put those dreams in my mind HIMSELF! And then, left me standing there in the middle of the road, while he went Allah knows where! It's like taking me to the highest mountain, showing me the world, and saying, "this is what you can't have." Okay, fine, so I'm not REALLY mad at him, and that he's given me sooo much to even be upset about being left hoping for more. When life offers you a dream so much beyond your expectations, it's not reasonable to grieve. And that's not what I'm grieving over. My pain lies elsewhere. It's just that I WANT to be mad right now. You know how sometimes you just want to fight? Yell it off at someone? Take all that sad energy and direct it in anger and then when you're spent, just slump into a ball in the arms of the person you chose as a punching bag? And you only choose really close ppl to you as punching bags.
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Grrrrrrrr.
I didn't know it was possible for the tiny broken pieces of a heart to break into their own mini pieces. I thought that maybe this would still be mine after I've lost everything else... but now even that's been given to someone else. I'm so robbed...
How much more am I going to be punished for everything I've done? And I get the feeling that my punishment has just begun...
Rani Im not even sure what I can say right now to bring you some comfort. I just know that Im here for you if you need to talk, vent, release. The forum is here for you. You know we'll listen.
I just, I dislike seeing that you are being so so so hard on yourself. I know it is your feeling, but I just ... I feel in my heart that you are being too harsh on yourself and this is causing you to pain even more.
About 'leading you on' ... sighs, so is this what had happened? I dont know why people do that hun. But sometimes, maybe its the other person who has been perceiving the actions as 'leading on' ... but Im not sure which is true in your case.
I feel down that your life is being interrupted so much by this. By someone who isnt there for you, by someone who is off in the world, doing his own thing, living his own life, doing his duties, just living life how he likes : and all of this without you. And yet, you are here, living life with him, for him, by him, even though he is no where around you or close to you. You see him, you feel him, you hear him, you dream of him, you yearn for him. But, Rani, is he somewhere else in the world, doing the same for you? Of course I dont know the answer ... but do you know it?
If there is anyone who knows the feeling of 'just wanting to fight' I think it would be me. I have gotten in much trouble because of this feeling of mine. And it has eased down alot over time. But, I know how it feels. It feels good, doesnt it? Despite the anger that it may cause in other people, it feels so good to us, because finally we get to 'be free' with what we feel, and what we feel is painful and angry and sad and mad and to translate that into the words that we speak ... it comes out as this 'fight' type of thing. When last did we joyfully expressed our sad, painful, angry feelings ? To think of it ... that can come off kinda strange hmm.
I wish the other people would understand what it is like for us. And to not see it as us being idiots who can't shut our angry mouths.
And I also know what you mean when you said you just WANT to be mad. I know how that feels. Sometimes, the same goes for, I just want to be emotional/sad (for a while, for THIS moment in time). Because it means something to me. And I need it. I guess ... our little moments with ourselves and our feelings ... allow us to get into good touch with what we really feel..deep down inside. Denial and force and suppression will have to take a break some time.
So Rani ... I dont know why I keep going on like this, I know its not helping you but .. I just want to say to you that .. if you need to just feel something, for a while, for a moment in time, feel it and feel it to the fullest. Because sometimes it is through these times, that we understand ourselves better and admit some things to ourselves. Also, Rani, I just want to say that friendly comfort, nice words, all of these things that your friends, family may say to make you feel better, may help you, but ultimately Rani, it is you who hold the power to free yourself from the cycle of your suffering. And it is God who has set this path for you and He will help you through. I know you are a girl of much faith. What the Lord take, he can give back, what He give, he can take back, the Lord can do anything. That is His power. Believe and you shall taste the blissful honey of freedom. Also, I want you to think for a while and understand how much this is interrupting your life hun. I dont know where that person is (Im not even sure if you know where he is right now), but ask yourself the question ... am I interrupting his life so?
Love you
Now smile for me. You cutie
Kavi, no sweetheart, I'm not being too harsh on myself. Others are harsher, trust me.
And lol no, that's not what happened. He didn't really lead me on lmao He did kinda, but i'm really glad that he did. lmao actually he once said to me to stop leading HIM on! lmao Kavi, let me clear some things up. I'm truly at peace with everything that happened between me and him. I WANTED to stop talking to him. It was like an answered prayer. I'm not REALLY mad at him, I just wanted to be mad, and I picked him to want to be mad at. I have no reason to be mad at him. He has given me so much. He helped me like myself during the time he spent with me. He's given me more than i thought I deserved, more than I thought was possible for me. It's just that I miss him sometimes and i just wish I knew how he was and what he was up to. I guess you can say I wish I could stalk him. lmao I do know where he is right now though. Our story is like the song do pal from veer zaara. It really was something that lasted for do pal (two moments) and in those two moments he gave me more than I asked for and I'm really really at peace with him. I don't know WHY he stopped talking to me, but I feel that since I couldn't stop, Allah helped me by having him stop, because he's a lot stronger than I am. See? Even in that he helped me. I DO wish I knew why HE feels he stopped talking to me though, like his reasons. But its not enough to make me not feel at peace with HIM. He's not really interupting my life. llike i said, my pain lies elsewhere. And I don't think i'm interrupting his life. Like I said before, I don't even know if he still thinks of me, if he even remembers me. But it's okay, because the time that he DID give me was more time than I thought any guy would give me. And not just time, but the attention, and the care, and the liking, and the dreams, and the sweetness. Everything with him was more than I ever expected. I don't grieve over that. I just miss him, is all. I hope that makes sense? lolly
Thank you though Kavi. you don't know how much your concern and care helps me through out all this. I love you too! And I WAS smiling while reading your post! hehe
boo: I miss my friend... bloody idiot went off on holiday... Life SUCKS!!
LOL *innocent look*
I love you!!! =D
I'M BACK NOW! =P
Unique_princess: boo: I miss my friend... bloody idiot went off on holiday... Life SUCKS!! LOL *innocent look* I love you!!! =D I'M BACK NOW! =P
I just reread this and cracked. up. I HATECHU LMBO
Funny how life sweeps the carpet that you thought was so safe from under your feet. Before you know it you're standing on pieces of broken glass.